Blogger won't let me upload a photo, so no photo of my front porch with its big flag flying in the breeze.
I am having a day off - no one is here. I have no plans. I have already had a two hour nap, have gone shopping for garden stuff at Target, and have done the work associated with that.
I think I am worn out from having a couple of dates with a man. It puts my brain into over-drive. I am not good at this - at all. I thought a break of years might have made me better able to handle this, but apparently not. Last night we went to see "Pirates of the Caribbean" in 3D! I had never seen a 3D movie before. It was fun. At one point, I got such a start, I screamed (quietly), and my date laughed. It was funny.
We went out for dinner at (another) expensive restaurant. Although I love good food and fine dining, I am a bit uncomfortable with the fact that this man has spent $250. on our dinners and movie in the last week. Honestly, I am just not good at this. I paid for the popcorn and pop last night - but I had to insist. Is that so wrong?
Oh, who knows how to behave? I don't.
I was a bit disturbed (again) by the role of the lead woman in the movie. Increasingly, women in the movies are just men with breasts and big, glossed up lips. Penelope Cruz is beautiful, but really, who would believe she could best a man in a fight? That is just stupid. I wish we would stop teaching our children (collectively) that women are "just as strong, just as tough" as men, and kick any man's ass in a fight. That is just wrong, conceptually, and factually.
Women are beautiful and strong, but God help us, we have a different kind of strength than the brute strength of a swashbuckler.
I will pray that God will be with me as I am trying to live my life. That I listen and not turn my back when it is convenient. I keep praying for Him to "Bless it, or block it."
Thanks for your prayers. As you can see, I need them.
The original date for Memorial Day was May 30.
ReplyDeleteThat is also my father's birthday. He died in 1984.
Congress changed the rules to make Memorial Day the last Monday in May, making the actual date fluid.
But when the original day, and my dad's real birthday align, it makes the Memorial Day a special moment as I go to the cemetery.
I notice you writing lately of fluid dates too. :)
Without a doubt, you now know that the rules of dating are all over the map, compared to only a few decades ago.
And, without structure and norms, there is a burr to overcome in the saddle ride of dating, for BOTH parties tread, oh so slowly, to avoid an end to the ride.
The money and who pays is up to the individuals and certainly a cause of discussion. Were you in my small community, a couple of dates for $250 would be "buying" what you want.
But I took a Rockette, her mom, and my daughter to a quick lunch in New York City a few years back. We had tea and split some desserts.
I offered to pay for all, as the Rockette got us terrific seats for the Christmas show.
I was stunned to see a bill for the above frugal meal come to $132 BEFORE tip. I guess the money is relative.
What I found most appealing of these dates you have, MC, is the timing.
Your Bible study was lengthy...years of work.
The graduation just capped it all. An interlude came into your life, and it seems to me that the Lord has filled that interlude up very well for you.
Enjoy the moment!
It is still so early in dating that it reminds me of Jeremiah Johnson (Robert Redford in the movie) starting a fire with a flick of flint, and huffing on the ember to make smoke and fire to warm up under a fir tree. The blaze took off; and it warmed a limb above.
That limb shed all of the snow upon the fire, and directly doused the hard built flames.
There is a time to make fire, and a place to make fire.
For safety these days, I pray you always let someone know where you are and how to contact you, or when, and who you will be with.
The world has changed.
You have too.
Purposely control the pace. It is not a favorite for men, and when pursuit is on, it is seen as interference to be tolerated by some men, and a definition of what a woman desires, for other men.
The revelation will be a key marker in your new relationship.
But having all that Bible study and new faith and life ahead of you, perhaps I will simply share a quote, by a theologian, I find relevant to your new status:
"Sometime I like to put sands of doubt into the oyster of my faith." ~~~Brother Cadfael
I suspect that one day, you will look terrific in a strand of new pearls.
It takes someone being irritating to the core, just to make ONE pearl.
Have faith in the new MC
And, feed your oyster at some less expensive spots, to see the reaction at those venues and fairs. Perhaps a picnic lunch in the mountains; tablecloth on the ground, wine, and sandwiches and fruit.
Everything else flows as smoothly as the original Memorial Day.
May your life be rich with many new memories to come.
I'm not sure about the dating rules today but the movie sounds great. If he is around your age he is probably simply a gentleman and expects to pay- plus take you to a very nice place, as you deserve. When you're more comfortable with each other you will most likely start doing other things. Maybe skating or bowling or perhaps a concert in the park!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you're enjoying yourself and I have no doubt that you're very grounded in your beliefs and how you intend to lead your life.
Keystone has a good point- make sure you let someone know who you are with and where you are. Take a photo w/your phone and send it to someone you trust. This guy is probably a gem but today you have to be cautious.
Glad you had a wonderful weekend!
Blogger is all screwed up. I still can't log in.
ReplyDeleteI've been married way too long to know any rules of dating. But from what I remember I felt uncomfortable if my date wanted to pay. But I did appreciate it her paying for something during the date. Sounds like you handled it fine. God bless. I wish the best for you. :)
I'm terrified just reading this Mary C, hahaha!!
ReplyDeleteMaybe check out this site, for guidlines for avoiding chaos (or at least spotting it):
http://loveaddicts.org/40questions.html
I also enjoy reading the posts at this blog.
http://thelovelyaddict.com/