Monday, August 29, 2011
So, I haven't posted anything for a couple of months. I have resumed my old blog. It is frustrating, but I have been told that others have found it helpful. I get much too opinionated on it, and try to temper that.
My life has truly changed due to the fact that I have been dating someone since May. We are truly "dating," it is nice. We have gone to Mass together which is wonderful. But this takes time. And it takes a lot of energy. I pray every morning that I am willing to accept God's will for this, and that I not force my own will. I am not someone who has a history of going slow into relationships, but it might be something I could learn.
One Saturday evening we had a date and I wanted to get to Mass a little early, so I went to the church just up the street that I don't like to go to. The homily was absolutely horrifying. The deacon told a "cute" little story that went like this:
A man and his dog had died. They were walking around in the clouds. There was a pearly gate and the man asked where he was. The gate attendant said "this is heaven, come on in." The man asked if his dog could come in. The gate attendant said no, so the man kept on walking. A bit later, there was another pearly gate. The attendant said "this is heaven, come on in." The man asked if his dog could come in and the attendant said "sure, there's dog food over there, and water dishes over there." Then the man confessed his confusion. He said he had just been told the other gate was heaven. To which the gate attendant said, "That was hell, it is there to filter out people who would deny their friends for their own selfish desires."
Let me get this straight: There's a fake heaven set up to trick people. That loyalty to a dog is more important than love for God. That wishing to be with God is a selfish desire. I could go on and on. I was horrified. This from the pulpit in a Catholic Church - at Mass! How many people, including children, might have bought this phony message.
On this past Saturday, I went to my parish. Good priest, good homily, but the music was absolutely dreadful. Hymns with drum rolls, flute, and a swinging beat... which women were head bobbing and hip swaying to. Really?
The sad thing is that I know I am in the wrong here. I cannot go to Mass to judge people. But honestly, I feel like I need a place to go where Mass is actually "holy."
And as I write this, I know where that is. It is about 10 miles away, but it is a thriving parish with three priests, a Catholic elementary school, an Adoration Chapel and Perpetual Adoration, and confession before every single Mass. I have never heard silly music at this church. I have never heard a ridiculous homily at this church.
I hate to switch churches again, but maybe I will. Is that the right thing to do? Opinions are welcome.
Thank you. I miss you guys.